Back On Your Side!
When I found out I was pregnant with Chase I was scared, but in the back of my mind I was excited that I was going to be in the “Mom Club”.I thought that all mothers were supportive, and that I would be able to relate to other women who had kids. Little did I know that mothers are some of the most competitive people I have ever come across. Everything is a contest, and everything is something to be argued or debated.
Breastfeeding vs Bottle Feeding. I nursed for a few weeks and then switched to bottles with both boys. Where do I fit in?
Cloth diapers vs Disposable. I’ve used clothies and Pampers. Where do I fit in?
To Co-sleep or not to Co-sleep. I’ve done both. Where do I fit in?
Cry it out or not. Yep, I’ve used both methods. What side do I take on that one?
Baby wearing? I’ve strapped both into Baby Bjorn’s on occasion, but strollers are nice too…
Rear facing older kids or not. I turned Chase at one, and then turned him back around at 16 months. No clear line here either.
Working mom or stay at home mom. I work a few hours a week, just enough to not be “allowed to consider myself a SAHM, but I don’t work enough to “understand” what it’s like to be a working mom.
I just don’t understand why the lines have to be drawn in the sand, and howdareyoucrossontomyside. We all do what we think is best for OUR child, that’s our job as parents. What kind of diapers you use, where your baby sleeps and how you get from point A to point B has no bearing on what kind of a parent you are. If you have tattoos it doesn’t mean you aren’t teaching your children respect. If you need public assistance, it doesn’t mean you don’t show your kids that life takes alot of hard work. I wish we could all just be MOMS and not have all these things that supposedly define what kind of Mom’s we are.
I’m the kind that loves my kids. I’m Ok with that.
Renewed.
I’ve been having a tough time with some things lately and have been feeling a bit lost. I’ve reached out to people I know in “real life”, but most are too busy with their own issues to really sit down and help me sort through things.
So I did the obvious next choice, I bitched about it on my twitter.
I’m not sure whether it’s sad or amazing that I got a better response, advice and encouragement from strangers than I did from my own friends.
One in particular stood out. I received an amazing email from a person I barely know that had advice, wisdom and encouragement I needed, and the assurance that it was OK to feel the way I did. I was floored that he would take the time to do this for me.
The last paragraph of the email sent to me goes as follows:
“Next question, why do you care enough to write an email like this to some one you barely know, Ben? It’s my nature, I guess. Which is my way of saying, “I don’t know.”
I’m so relieved to find there are still people in our society that will go our of their way to help, without any personal gain to be found. I have a renewed faith in people, in a time when that faith was wavering. Not only in others, but in myself. I know that feelings like I’m having take time to heal, and might not ever go away, but that it really all depends on me.
Now i just need to renew my license, and all will be right.
Thanks Ben. See you on twitter.













